What I Learned this Halloween...

This past Halloween has taught me so much. I normally try to make my kids Halloween costumes. Why? Well, prior to this past weekend, because in all honesty, I thought it made me a better mom. How ignorant my thinking has been. Owen was easy. He wanted to be Buzz Lightyear. I knew I wasn't going to make that costume. He's two, he won't mind a store bought one. Done. Easy. Jenna wanted to be a cat. Another no brainer. Half store bought, half home embellished. Done. She loved it. I am Mom, hear me roar. Alex, well, here is the back story on Alex. Alex loves Halloween for the load of candy it brings. But Alex has never been one to dress up. He never played dress when he was younger. He doesn't like things to be "different" - silly sock days, he feels embarrassed to wear two different socks; mixed up day - you would think we asked him to chop off an arm by asking him to wear his clothes inside out; you get the point? He doesn't like masks or things about his head. So, he took his time thinking about what he wanted to be. It's as if dressing up at Halloween causes him physical pain. But Alex finally decided on a mummy. Great! Easy!! No problem. I gathered my supplies. I spent a morning cutting strips from a white bed sheet and coffee staining them to get that great dirty mummy color. All I had to do was wrap him. I even had the forethought to get some double-sided fabric tape to help the strips stick. Saturday Oct 30th comes. We have a Halloween costume party at Alex's friend's house. We begin to wrap and realize that as he moves, the wrap falls apart. We try again and again. We get safety pins. No luck. What are we doing wrong? It is one hour later and we are now late for the party. We decide to go with what we have and we will change him shortly after we get to the party. But no, Alex can't even make it out the door without the costume falling apart. Remember, Alex doesn't like to dress up so we have no alternative costumes on hand. Realizing he has no costume for a costume party, Alex breaks down. I normally try to hold back my tears when my kids are hurting. I want to show them a strong face. But this time, as I held him, I let the tears flow. I had let him down. I felt like a huge failure. We dried our tears and went to the party. Luckily, some of the other kids didn't dress up either. Alex had a blast and I was happy for him. But after getting them to bed that night, I was still thinking about how I could make this mummy costume work. I stayed up until 2am putting it together and it looked great! Despite being exhausted, and now sick with a terrible cold, I was happy to have gotten it done and couldn't wait for Alex to wake up in the morning. Well, despite the fact that I allowed for room in the wraps for Alex's body, the awesome looking costume did not fit him. I busted seams trying to make it work, but to no end was his body fitting in the costume. Another huge failure! The only thing we could do was to run out and buy him a costume for trick or treating. Let me tell you, with a picky child, there is little to choose from on Halloween morning. Alex didn't want the ninja, ghostbuster, cowboy, army solider, or mario costumes. Forget anything remotely ghostly or scary - so not Alex. But after 3 stores he finally found something he wanted; a blue penguin. Now, we hesitated with this. We tried to talk him out of it. Joe said that if Alex were going out with his friends he would be laughed at (said to me, not to Alex). But Alex insisted. When we put it on Alex, his face kind of fell. He looked uncomfortable to me and, again, my heart broke because I felt like all of this was my fault. I quickly thought up 2 other costumes he could wear. But Alex said he was going to be the penguin. So, we all got ready, we snapped our pictures, and off we went to take the kids trick or treating. By the 3rd house, Joe and I looked at how happy our kids were, how much fun they were having, and we knew that the penguin costume was perfect for Alex. I wish I could have enjoyed that night more. But I was tired, I was sick, I was emotionally spent. And it was while I watched my kids running from house to house that I realized that it is OK to just go to the store and buy a Halloween costume. What matters most, is that my kids get to be what they want to be, that they have fun, and that I don't have the weight of the world on my shoulders trying to be the "perfect" mom. Because being the "perfect" mom results in me being stressed, grumpy, mean, and totally missing the fun of the moment. I learned that I am not Martha Stewart. I am not a woman who can do everything...cook, sew, craft, organize. After 8 years of being a mom, I have finally learned that I cannot do everything and do it well. It was a lesson I learned through tears on my part and on the part of my oldest son. It was a lesson I learned with a broken heart. But finally the lesson has been learned and I will embrace not being perfect.

Remember me?

I used to actually blog with some regularity. Now, it seems like a thing of the past along with scrapbooking, downtime, and sanity among other things! And as I sit down to type, thinking I may have just a moment, my little man has found me and how he hates seeing me at the computer. He knows it means I won't pay attention to him. So, he resorts to destruction to pull me away from his dreaded enemy...yes, I hear it beginning now. He is rummaging behind me, looking for something to destroy. Better go for now before it gets bad. Maybe I'll try again when he is asleep, if I don't fall asleep with him!

Friday, last full day at the beach

Happy Birthday Owen!!! We had so much fun celebrating Owen's first birthday at the beach. It was a rough start for Owen. He woke up around 5:30am, cranky and crying. It took two bottles to finally get him back to sleep around 6:30am. By then, the other two were up but they were playing quietly, so I slept in until 7am. I made everyone breakfast - and the birthday boy and Joe finally woke around 8am. After we ate, it was time to open presents! Alex got Owen a stuffed frog. Jenna got Owen a car. Mom and Dad got Owen a toy remote control, which he did not want to let go of all day! Heather got Owen clippos and they were a huge hit with all three kids! Some green stuff fell out of Heather's card, too! Due to our celebrations, we had a late start to the beach. But, wow, what a day!! The waves were out of control!! They were huge and powerful and we had a blast. Joe, the daredevil, went way out and let the waves crash over his head. Me, well, I was more cautious and when the break reached my shoulders I called it quits and headed for land. Alex and Jenna had so much fun sitting further inland and letting the waves push them ashore. I tried it once and what a ride! Owen had another great day in the waves and playing in the sand. He looks so cute walking down the beach. We hit the pool on our way back to the condo for a quick dip and then up for lunch. After lunch we sang to Owen, though I forgot the candle...bad Mommy! I made Owen froggy cupcakes and he did a number on one!!! He is destructive by nature, and he unleashed his wrath on this poor cupcake! More of it went through his tiny fists than actually got in his mouth! It was a great time! After a short nap, the kids wanted to go back to the pool. Owen and I headed to the beach for a short walk. We saw a small crab and Owen loved chasing it. Owen really wanted to go in the water but it was really low tide and the sand was really soft, I just kept sinking. I didn't go out as far as he wanted and he was getting angry! Luckily, Joe and the kids joined us on the beach and Joe took Owen out further for his "wave fix". We played in the water a bit longer but the wind really picked up and the sand started to blow, which does not feel nice at all. We ran for the condo and as we were getting in a storm blew in. It was actually nice to watch a storm out at ocean. It blew over soon and now it is nice again. I'd like to get on the balcony for one more night, but I'm trying to get us all packed up. How fast the week went by!!! It has been a great vacation for all of us and I am so happy we did this. Now, if only I can remember this feeling 3 hours into our trip back home, 6 hours in, 9 hours in....15 hours driving time alone - then count in the potty breaks, the food breaks, the gas breaks - they never all line up! We'll be home Sunday. Until then...

Thursday at the Beach

Yet another great day here at Myrtle Beach! We spent the morning down at the beach where Owen decided that today was the day he would just plunge into the ocean and stick his face in the water! He also enjoyed playing in the wet sand. He would gather handfuls and try to throw them, however, throwing for Owen means dropping them behind him, or in this case, on top of his head. Luckily, his hat caught most of the mess! Alex caught a minnow and was very proud of himself. He went running up the beach to show Joe, who was making sandcastles with Jenna. We were yelling at him to put the fish back into the water, I think he made it...at least, I hope he did. Owen took a nice siesta on the beach and I held him while I sat with my beach chair in the water's edge...bliss! Afterwards we took a dip in the pool. Alex is getting really good in the water and Jenna and I had a great game of "shark and diver" where she was the shark trying to get me, the diver. We came back up for some lunch and then got ready to go shopping. The kids had been given money by family members and were eager to spend it. We went to this really nice shopping area that resembled a coastal town, complete with boardwalks and water. Owen was treated to his first ice-cream and the "more" sign was in full force after his first bite! Back to the condo for dinner and then bed. Tonight was the first night I did not sit on the balcony and listen to the ocean. Instead, I was busy in the kitchen making cupcakes for Owen's first birthday tomorrow!! I cannot believe that my baby will be turning one year old. We have a few small presents for him and plan to spend the day on the beach, our last full day here.

Wednesday at the Beach

This morning we saw a pod of dolphins playing in the ocean!! It was amazing! At first we saw three sets of two dolphins, one set coming shortly behind the other. The second set played in front of our building for a bit, jumping out of the ocean so we could get a good look. I was able to capture bits of them on camera but it was difficult to do. After the third set swam out of our view Joe noticed more further out in the ocean. It appears that the six we saw were like scouts while the rest of the pod stayed further back. It was great and I am so glad that I finally saw some sea life!! Our morning consisted of some time on the beach, where we were finally able to build a sand castle without Owen destroying it. Owen actually got into the ocean today, wave jumping with Joe. Joe would put Owen into the water and then pick him up as the wave came in. Owen was full of laughs with that! Joe, Jenna, and Alex saw a stingray in the water, too. Before coming back up to the condo we stopped at the pool for a quick swim. Owen and I didn't last long as the water was too cold for Owen. So, we headed up and let the others swim a bit longer. Owen took a nice long nap and after lunch the older two eventually crashed also. I had some time to myself on the beach today thanks to Joe. It was great. I took my chair and a magazine and sat at the waters edge just soaking up the sun and the beauty of the ocean. We all had dinner on the balcony and decided to take a stroll on the beach afterwards. I thought this would be a perfect time for my envisioned photo session on the beach. Well, what I envision and what my reality is are two different things. I got the kids dressed, we found a nice empty spot, took maybe one or two pictures with a fussy Owen and then the batteries died. Joe ran up to get new batteries, the kids got wet, Owen got into the sand, and somehow our nice empty spot on the beach became a football field. Joe got back, Owen was no longer in the mood for any type of pictures, and the kids just wanted to play in the water. Well, we did the best we could and I haven't looked at any of the pictures yet, but I hope I got a few decent shots. I don't think I have any good ones of the three kids together. Oh well. We came back for some dessert, I put Owen to bed and when it got dark, Joe headed to the beach with Alex and Jenna for some crab hunting! They caught one and spotted a few more. They had lots of fun and Joe got about 3 minutes of it on tape. Well, I am being summoned by my little man. Another great day at the beach!

Tuesday at the Beach

Today was a much better morning for me. I was up early with my boys and enjoyed a nice breakfast with them while Joe and Jenna slept in. Of course, I didn't get to see anything cool like dolphins or sharks, but I had fun with the boys anyway. We hit the beach about 9am and actually remembered to bring the camera this time. The kids went right into the ocean even though it was a bit chilly this morning. And of course, they collected tons of shells. Jenna has added some seaweed to her collection also. Owen was a bit scared of the sand and water this morning. He didn't want any of it touching his toes but he certainly wanted to be out in the waves! He loves watching them roll in and crash against my legs. He laughs as I squeal and say another one is coming for us! Finally, he decided to get down in the sand and I tried to build a sand castle with him. Well, Owen the Destroyer likes me to make a castle so that he can quickly knock it down. He went exploring and likes the tall grass along the beach. Owen took a nice nap on the beach and I didn't end up with a baby outline tan as I had thought while I held him! We came back in around 11am for an early lunch, showered and headed out to Ripley's Aquarium. The kids really enjoyed it and so did we! There was one part where we stood on a moving floor and went through a glass tunnel so that the fish and sharks were swimming overhead as well as on both sides of us. Owen was in awe! His face was priceless. Alex and Jenna were amazed at all the sharks. Afterwards we headed out for some seafood - well, I had salad and non-water living food. The kids ate their weight in crab legs and Joe ate his weight in all the seafood they had to offer, he was in heaven. With full bellies, we headed back to our beach home. Everyone is sleeping now, ready for another full day at the beach tomorrow, with some added pool time at Jenna's request.

Myrtle Beach

So, I have to play catch up since this is the first time I have had a chance to blog. Prepare for a long post! Friday June 19 - So, things never go the way you plan, even if you plan well. We were supposed to have gotten on the road by 4am. Life lesson #1 - we are never on the road when we say we will be. We headed out the door at 5am and learned life lesson #2 - just because you pull your kids out of bed in the early morning, they do not go back to sleep. We started our journey and my plan was to drive until 8am when we would stop for breakfast. Life lesson #3 - I am not an out-the-door-on-the-road type of person. I need to eat within 30 minutes of waking, so I was very sick and on the verge of puking, so we had to stop earlier for breakfast. That started the non-stop potty breaks that Jenna required. Needless to say, it was a long day spent traveling. We all had a great time going through the mountains. We went through two tunnels, through the mountains, and Alex and Jenna thought that was just the coolest thing ever. The kids, for the most part, traveled well. Our last minute decision to buy a dual screen DVD player really paid off! We finally stopped for the night at 7pm (eastern time) and ended up in a less than stellar hotel. It looked great from the outside, the lobby was nice, the room horrible! Owen found a pot pipe and glass jar in the drawer and his feet were filthy from walking on the floor. It was late, the kids were tired, against our better judgement we stay but I made sure discounts were given. Saturday June 20- It was another full day of traveling. As we got closer we ran into Myrtle Beach tourist traffic and spent a long time going a short distance. But we arrived at our condo around 5pm. And it is so worth the long drive!! This place is beautiful!! Our balcony looks out right onto the ocean. We hear the waves from our bedroom. It is a short walk to the beach - like down the elevator and a minute to the sand. The condo is beautifully decorated and has the comforts of home. As much as we wanted to hit the beach, we had to get some dinner and do our grocery shopping. We ate at a great deli and then headed to Walmart. Wow! What an experience that was! I don't even want to know what that place would look like if a hurricane were on the way, but I think we got a glimpse of what if could be like. I have never been to a store that packed before and so picked over. It was all tourists stocking up for the week. Grapes were gone, cheese was gone, small containers of ketchup and mustard gone. The shelves were empty! We gathered what we could and headed back to the condo. It was a late night and we just all headed to bed. Sunday June 21 - Our first beach day!!! We were up early, had breakfast on the balcony, changed into our swimsuits, lotioned up and headed to the beach. Alex and Jenna charged right in and took to jumping the waves like pros. They had two boogie boards here at the condo - the way Jenna was on it, she looked like she belonged on the other ocean!! Owen, well, it took my baby some time to come around. He didn't like the feel of the sand on his feet. He hated the water. But he loved watching the waves. After some time, he was willing to put his feet down but if a wave got to close we had to pick him up. After he got braver, he started exploring more. However, as he was walking back up the beach to me he stepped on a shell and cut his foot. It isn't bad, it doesn't hurt him, but it bothered me all the same. I kept him out of the sand for the rest of the day. We headed back up to the condo for a snack and decided to just stay in until lunch. Well, Alex and Jenna don't really spend much time indoors. They love the balconies and spend all their time out on them. We had lunch on the balcony, had some quiet time and then went down to the pool. We didn't stay too long because the ocean was calling the kids! Back to the beach for some more wave jumping and shell collecting. Back up to the condo for baths, dinner and a movie - we watched E.T. and then to bed. Joe and I like to spent some time on the balcony watching the waves and listening to the ocean after we put the kids down. Monday June 22 - Today I woke up sick, very sick. I was in bed all day with a severe headache and nasty stomach. I don't even remember how many times I threw up. It sucks being sick and listening to the waves and wanting so badly to go to the beach! Joe was a huge help and took all three kids down to the beach for the morning so I could rest. They had a great time and saw lots of wild life. In the early morning they saw dolphins swimming in the ocean from the balcony as well as a school fish and larger fish, maybe even small sharks, eating the school! They saw crabs and little bugs of some sort when they went down to the beach and of course, they came back with lots of shells. Lunch on the balcony with Dad, quiet time on the balcony while Owen napped with me in bed. Then the older two and Joe headed down to the beach again. I was feeling much better and planned on bringing Owen down to meet them, but discovered we were out of formula so back to the dreaded Walmart to get some. It wasn't as bad today and we made it back in time to head to the beach. This place is great because it is next to a preserve so the beach is less crowded and a bit of a further walk down and you feel like you have your own private beach. Today I got into the ocean and jumped the waves, first by myself and then with Jenna. Alex and Jenna built castles and we stayed to watch them be destroyed by the high tide. Owen is loving the water now and is getting into the shell collecting thing too. Of course, he loves to pick them up and put them straight into his mouth! Dinner on the balcony, baths and then to bed. I love being able to type while sitting on the balcony and listening to the waves. It's too dark to see them now, but the sound is so relaxing. Time to go to bed.